Reflections

People don't always realize when they are in a good place...
Maybe it's because we often are always looking for something better... brighter...
more fulfilling...

It's in human nature.

Looking for a purpose greater than what we are currently involved in..
As humans we are looking for things that drive faster... work better.. produce more.. look prettier..

That's what we are looking for.
Now as I'm writing.. I feel as if I'm having a dejuvu moment- about a time just a bit ago when I wrote about a feeling the same.

When we are experiencing something above elation.. we forget the bad times.. we forget the unruly times.. we forget even the thoughts we were thinking a few seconds prior to our sudden ecstasy. We are fluid beings; beings that are capable of thinking and moving and accomplishing much...

We have things that stop us...
Thoughts...
Addictions...
Hate...
Wealth...
Prejudice...

Lots of things. We get lost. We get confused. We actually do need... a Savior.

The problem with humans is that we're looking for our own personal fulfillment.. but we don't even know what this is... because we don't know ourselves... yeah we don't know ourselves. scary.

The one who made us, the creator, has had his hand on us since the beginning of creation... and knows everything about us.. our desires.. our needs.. our wants.. even...

our purpose.

The purpose.. the purpose of life. That would be nice to know.. only discoverable... by listening to what God's telling you?

So wait, hold up- my purpose isn't the ritual... grow up , learn, get married, start a family, grow old, die? Uhm.. no. I don't think so. And yours isn't either.

Although there are things that are a part of your purpose doesn't make THE purpose or your purpose. So often we look too often upon what we are doing... yet,,, it's not always what we are doing... it's who we are developing to be.......

Okay, so the people I look up to.. in life.. they aren't people who are like amazing dazzling people.. because honestly that just encompasses so little..

The people that I look up to, some are in high positions, some in low.. but regardless.. of it all... it's the words that are spoken to you.. the actions that they have taken toward you.. and the spirit that you are speaking with. So. face. to face. Here we are- speaking in the spirit and the flesh.. yet there's something more that attracts us to people...

There's people who are attracted to people by their looks, their money, their skills, their hobby, their religion, their goodness...

but honestly, there's something that makes people truly worthy... and that's Jesus.

So if you are finding someone, and they are hard to talk to because maybe they aren't all those things.. maybe they need to find Jesus.. because he makes people beautiful, rich in spirit, joyful, helping, kind, purposeful... so. think again.. think some more.. and share the gift that you freely received.

Morning.

Sobering moments by the light of the field
Remembrances that sink deeply into the soul
Calming waves swish over my mind
Good Morning God, Good Morning world.

Did you forget?

Did you forget the things I did for you says the Lord?
Did you forget all the good things I have put in your life?
Did you forget.....

Do you remember that circumstance..?
It was really bad... yet did you see how I blessed you?
Did you see who I brought into your life because of it?
Do you see the compassion that is displayed now because of what I've chosen to do...

With Your Life.


Did you forget my blessing?
Because you gave it away?
You traded it for a birth right...
That was meant to stay.

Does your flesh cry out against you?
That you can't listen to my voice.
Do you not know that you cannot be for one and another.
The Lord Your God is one God...
and Him only shall you serve.

Blessed be the man that walks in uprightness toward God.
Blessed is the man who puts behind the old man
and is Alive in the new life..
Blessed are those that are obedient unto my name.

Bless the Lord Oh, My Soul... Bless the Lord.

SUMMER FREEDOM!!!

HOORAY!!! August 7th....2015.... the last summer.... I'll ever have experienced while I was still in college!!! WOW!!! :) I so cannot believe it!!! It's such an extremely awesome and rewarding feeling. I've spent five years of my life, going to school (and working in between time), but now soon... it will be but a faint memory of hours spent in classrooms.. writing papers... and thinking about how smart you are.. yet now. The time is come- where all is FLUX. :) My performance will no longer be for my own "good" or my own "liking" as far as grades... instead it will be a test of my professionalism and know how. I am destined to mess up- have good days- have learning days-- and be in FLUX- forevermore.
For now, I feel slight certain, that these times are a time of security.. for college.. the worst that can happen.. is possibly an A- or a B... yet.. I don't receive any monetary anything for this work- it's simply for myself for my own professional development.
I feel eager and excited... I have 3 weeks of SUMMER FREEDOM <3 Before journeying back off to school. I'm super excited and happy... however... I am going to enjoy all the challenges that school brings my way this last full semester at school. I'm going to joy in the pains of long papers, tainted sleep, and complaining classmates. I'm going to joy in the hardships of task and labor of work.. of the babbling children and those of interesting comment. Bring it life, for thus is life... in all, in all, is everything. :)

:) ... So now may be the time to create my bucket list.. I only have a few.
*Visit Mary Ellen for a week
*Order all my new textbooks
*Go school shopping
*Get some new tennis shoes...
And enjoy every adventure as it comes. For who knows what the best day is. For a best day is something we decide within ourselves. Perhaps, our best day could be our worst day if we perceive it correctly. Maybe our very sorrows are our real triumphs. Maybe then, today. :) is the day.

Trust & Faith

     There are some days when I am so troubled; I wake up in the middle of the night and I feel as though it is hard for me to breathe. This happened again last night. It had been a while since this episode type occurrence happened. I'd say it was due to the lack of trusting God. For the last week and a half, I think I did a good job listening to God, rejected my sense of self and trusting in whatever he said.

----However, I don't think I did last night. I really didn't have peace and I felt troubled. This just isn't the way one should feel if they are trusting God.

 

These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

John 16:33

So, I understand that in this world, I will have tribulation (a cause of great trouble or suffering) but I should be able to be cheerful because God has overcome the world. Maybe that's the whole point then...

Trusting God at all times...

even when things look rough

Even when that "same thing keeps happening" and you don't understand why...

 

Even when life seems so different than usual....

 

Trust God.

 

Last night at Bible Study, one of the girls, Sophie, mentioned about the "tree of knowledge of good and evil". Suddenly, as she was speaking, something occurred to me that I had never thought of before.

.... The thing that we seem to struggle most about.....

 

KNOWING WHY...WHAT...WHEN?!

 

Yet, I feel like part of our wanting to KNOW is what gets us into trouble... I just thought about it like this... Adam and Eve were in the garden... they sinned and they knew "good and evil"... then all of sudden because they knew more then they were supposed to they looked at each other and were ashamed

"WHY ARE WE NAKED?!"

 

-All along, it didn't seem to matter- they didn't know. It was just the way it was... nothing more to it.. Yet when they knew the realm of good.. and also of evil... they saw what could be evil.. and then questioned God...

 

So... the best part of life.... is when we can trust God regardless of what we know or don't know...

 

Then we can surely have peace.





From Spring to Summer

In the Spring, I got a new computer. A desktop in fact- please see the computer box on the bed, haha. I loved it so much because it had been so long since I ever had in my procession.. a desk top.. computer. :)

In the Spring, I finished up my long hours of student teaching... and looked forward to finishing the classes that seemed as if they were never going to end.

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And NOW... it's summer outside!!! I took this picture today- and as you can see my skin has changed shade since the Spring- not because I'm a hard laborer in the yard (as I wish I could say) but from the leisure days in the pool- sometimes spent doing work of "reading".

I only have... 4 more days left of summer school and ONE more big paper to write for the summer (12 pages...)! And then I'll be all done.... for the summer.

Here's a picture that I water-colored as part of my K-2 Literacy class. We were learning how we should use the same template.. and then the students can fill in the blanks. Here are some of my classmates works of art...

So- you get the idea. These templates make students basically... brilliant without even knowing it. Best of all- you can make a really cool book- or something interesting out of it.

This school semester is going to be the busiest I've ever experienced before (as far as school work). I'm taking ten classes (25 credits) and I got elected as the Vice President of one of Christian organizations on campus- so all the work that entails will surely increase the amount of time spent on task. Besides that, I also need to spend 120 hours teaching in the Fall.. plus 60 hours I have to make up from the summer. *joyous* :) Overall, it will be worth it because I will only have my student teaching then- and then in "essence" I'll experience the easiest, most rewarding school semester ever.. NEXT YEAR! And best of all, my brother will be home!!! <3

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Here's a picture from earlier this year. My cutie pie 2nd cousins got to stay a whole week with us. :) It was a wonderful time to have the. Unfortunately, the reason we went down there was because my great Aunt died- however, all is well. :) because she's in a better place....

AND WITHOUT FURTHER ADO... I CANNOT WAIT FOR 2 WEEKS FROM NOW.. when I will get to see my favorite friends in the world! :) <3

Oh yeah!! We got to see a 50's doowop band the other day! It was a blast, unfortunately I don't have any pictures myself- however it was fun- and there was great music! :) Here's one to share in honor of my Auntie that died.!